Have you ever witnessed someone forming rigid, absolute opinions about a person they’ve never even spoken to? Naturally, to comment meaningfully on someone’s character — unless they’re a historical figure — we must have actually met them. When we rely solely on what others say, misinformation is inevitable. While personality may show certain consistent traits, relationships are, at their core, subjective experiences. This is why, particularly in couples therapy, therapists are taught to listen supportively and non-judgementally to both parties. No one is ever entirely at fault. Even in extreme cases — infidelity, for instance — we are still expected to hear the story of the person who betrayed. This is Communication 101.

So why is it that once we step outside the therapy room, we so easily jump to conclusions — especially about those who are just a little bit different from us? The purpose of this article is to advocate for those “different from us” — to raise awareness about the psychological harm and social exclusion neurodivergent individuals endure, often based on second-, third-, or even fourth-hand narratives. These are people many of us have never even spoken to — and yet we feel entitled to judge and ostracise them.

What Is Neurodivergence?

Let me begin with a relatively new term entering modern psychology: neurodivergent individuals. While not yet included as a formal umbrella category in manuals like the DSM-5-TR or ICD-11 (APA, 2022; WHO, 2022), it is expected that the concept will gradually be integrated into diagnostic frameworks.

Neurodivergent individuals are those whose brains process information, language, attention, emotions, or sensory input in ways that deviate from neurotypical norms (Singer, 1999; Armstrong, 2010). These are individuals who don’t follow predictable patterns in cognition and behaviour — instead, they move through life like unexpected rhythms in a piece of music. Like postmodern jazz.

Neurotypical individuals are those whose cognitive and social development aligns with average societal norms. Their brain development progresses along statistically common trajectories — in terms of IQ, social functioning, and even educational background. They make up the majority. In contrast, neuroatypical individuals show alternative developmental pathways — sometimes due to subtle structural or hormonal differences in the brain (e.g., intrauterine testosterone levels) (Baron-Cohen et al., 2002).

From Microaggressions to Structural Exclusion

These individuals face persistent discrimination — in schools, workplaces, and within group dynamics. They’ve often internalised this mistreatment from early childhood, normalising the cold shoulders, the ridicule, the sighs. One contributing factor may be the lack of behavioural filtering seen in some neurodivergent profiles. In psychological terms, this means lower inhibitory control. They often wear their emotions on their sleeve — a phrase commonly used in English-speaking cultures.

In fact, British culture, which places high value on emotional restraint, might even consider saying “I like you” as a bold example of “wearing your emotions on your sleeve.” Cultural perception plays a large role here.

What we label as a disorder — or, in more modern psychological discourse, as a “difference” — is deeply shaped by cultural context. A person who might be diagnosed with Histrionic Personality Disorder in Sweden could simply be seen as “passionate” in Italy (Henrich et al., 2010). Emotional expression, social pace, and even conversational norms differ vastly between East Asia and the Mediterranean.

What Conditions Fall Under Neurodivergence?

            •           Asperger’s / High-Functioning Autism: Difficulty with social communication, intense interest areas, reliance on routines. Now categorised under Autism Spectrum Disorder in the DSM-5 (APA, 2022).

            •           ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder): Challenges with impulsivity, sustained attention, and executive functioning.

            •           Dyslexia: Difficulties in reading and processing written language.

            •           Dyscalculia: Struggles with mathematical concepts and numerical reasoning.

            •           Tourette’s Syndrome: A neurodevelopmental condition involving motor and vocal tics (Robertson, 2015).

The Real Struggle: Misinterpretation and Literal Thinking

One of the most significant challenges for neurodivergent individuals is their tendency to interpret language literally. They may miss implied meanings or struggle with inside jokes. They are often painfully direct — not because they lack tact, but because their thinking is structured differently. This directness, when filtered through the lens of neurotypical norms, is often mistaken for rudeness or arrogance. Their expansive vocabularies and use of less common or “archaic” words further separate them from mainstream social fluency.

As a result, in professional or academic settings, they are often labeled as cold, overly formal, or socially awkward. This leads to reputational harm — exclusion from opportunities, misunderstandings in communication, and, ultimately, loss of trust or status in competitive environments.

This harm is most profound in cultures like Turkey or many Middle Eastern societies, where collectivism and conformity are emphasised. In such environments, deviation from behavioural norms can trigger swift social sanctions. Meanwhile, in places like Northern Europe, despite higher emotional inhibition, tolerance for cognitive and neurological difference is often stronger, rooted in a broader respect for individual rights.

Now let’s imagine the most privileged among neurodivergent individuals — the “Asperger-types,” the gifted minds with access to books, languages, and self-development. If lucky, they may succeed in migrating to more accepting countries, where they find belonging and recognition. But even then, success is often not fulfillment — it’s escape. The desire to belong still lingers, unfulfilled.

But what about those with dyslexia, dyscalculia, or ADHD? Those without the same verbal memory, who struggle silently in rigid systems?

Their struggle is doubly difficult — not just because of their brain’s wiring, but because society is determined to kick them while they’re already down. Judgment, exclusion, gossip — these are their everyday realities.

Neurodivergent individuals aren’t asking for pity. They’re asking for space. In a capitalist world obsessed with uniformity and performance, making space for difference is not a favour — it’s a moral obligation. If we fail to create inclusive academic, professional, and social spaces, we will continue to lose intellectual, creative, and human potential.

We don’t need a world of one color. We need the courage to let each hue shine.

Long live the countries, institutions, and communities that embrace neurodivergent minds — not in spite of their difference, but because of it.